To catch the thoughts that wander around my head throughout the day and then actually put it down on some text box is a little narcissistic of me - isn’t it? I want someone to realize my worth and value my words - indirectly. I don’t get to choose the ones who take the time to read what I write. But they directly see who it is written by and maybe even get an idea of exactly what I’m writing about (no matter how vague I try to be).
I’ve once deleted a whole date I had with someone. As in, I came home that evening and just deleted all the pictures I took that day. We had dinner and held hands,but I knew from the beginning of that day that things weren’t going to work out with us even if things progressed. I was going to pull the plug. Beep, beep, beep, and silence.
To help, I forget things easily, but I guess we can all use that excuse (except the folks that have photographic memory). But if I don’t take pictures or don’t write about it - I’ll probably forget it. Maybe I’m just scared… to be able to relive a bitter memory. That’s just it though. Life isn’t all about the sweet things. We learn and adapt from the bitter- that’s how we enjoy and cherish where we are now.
But hey, this is just a blog. This is just a little part of my life and it can be filtered out as much as I want it to.